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Category: FinDom sessions: The slave dos and don’ts

Sex is overrated.

Sex is overrated.

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Did the title catch your attention? I hope so, because I will try to explain better what I mean, and I do hope to have your full attention. Not sure if many slaves will agree on me about this, but I’m kinda curious about it.

What does excite me?

That’s where this all idea started. I started questioning myself what is that gets me going, what excites me, what…well…what makes me hard the most.

And you will probably say “Come on, it’s findom. We know that”. Wrong. It’s not JUST findom, it’s findom done in a certain way, it’s something more than findom or, to be precise, something BEFORE findom.

The teasing.

A woman, self-confident, perfectly aware of the effect She has on men, perfectly aware of what makes me weak, that slowly starts doing things that get me going. 

A shoe slowly coming off the foot, then dangling from the tip of her toe. Her legs flexing back and forth, to expose all their length and beauty. The noise of nylons rubbing together. That knowing smile on her face, while she looks right into my eyes. Her tongue slowly going all over her lips. Her sexy walk on those high heels, with her body perfectly balanced on them. The tone of her voice: calm, relaxed and yet tremendously sexy. 

All these things lead me to be so excited, so hypnotized by her, so eager to see her doing more of that stuff….that I end up losing control, and at that point sending more money only excites me even more. That’s the moment when Findom comes in place.

What about sex?

Everyone says how great sex is, how they couldn’t live without it. Apparently, no one can be happy without sex, no couple can survive if sex isn’t amazing and perfect. There is no way one can be fulfilled without sex…but is that really true? Do we really all think like this? 

To me, sex is like going to the gym. Lots of physical activity, lots of sweating, you feel tired afterward and…while you are at it, do you actually enjoy it? Sorry but I don’t. I don’t need my penis inside a vagina to feel pleasure, I don’t need to do all those exercises to be satisfied. Hell, sometimes I don’t even need to cum to be totally happy!

Is this selfish? Yes, it is. I know that a woman probably needs sex more than I do to be satisfied. And I do have sex with my wife…but that doesn’t mean I find it more exciting than being teased. Is this weird? Probably, but who cares? I’ve been called a weirdo for many other things!

Am I the only one?

I’ve been asking myself quite a lot and, frankly, this is also one of the reasons why I wrote this post. The fact that I would rather be teased than have sex, doesn’t feel totally right. I have complete respect for Women (obviously, being a slave) so their pleasure should always come first, but instead I’m being way too much selfish in feeling like this. 

But then again…is this something I can control? Can you teach someone to like chocolate if he does not? 

So yes, the main question here is… am I the only one who would rather be teased till he cums, instead of actually have sex? Can you help me understand this, guys?

Blackmail: 4 ways to escape from it

Blackmail: 4 ways to escape from it

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escape-from-blackmail

Blackmail is one of the most exciting and controversial fetishes in my opinion, surely one of the closer ones to illegal activity: believe it or not, it’s illegal to blackmail someone, even if it’s a consensual “game”. If the victim goes to a judge saying he got convinced in doing it, most probably the judge will rule in his favor but…

How many of us could (and would want to) sue one of these Goddesses? I mean…first of all it would be stupid because we were the one that wanted it in first place and, secondarily, how can you run after someone you know almost nothing about or lives in a different country?

But yet i get from time to time messages from more or less desperate slaves, saying this or that Goddess keeps blackmailing them even if they don’t want to go on, that they risk all their life savings and so on…

How do you stop Her from blackmailing you?

In a few words: it’s complicated and it works only if she is smart enough to understand when it’s the right time to take a step back.
Good news: all the best Goddesses are of course intelligent and smart enough.

So the first rule is: never play blackmail with a newbie, with a Goddess who’s around since not so long or that no one ever heard of. Most probably she is too inexperienced to even play that game in first place.

Ignoring the fact that she can or cannot understand, there are indeed a few ways you can approach the problem.

1 – The Joke

Next time she contacts you, start acting funny. Act as she is just a friend. Tell her jokes, act as if this is all a total joke for you and laugh about it. Keep doing that, and if she doesn’t get the message, end the conversation (smiling) saying you gotta go. Leave her with the doubt: “Does he really care? Will i get anything from this?”

2 – The Change

In a calm, relaxed way tell her you don’t want to play this game anymore. Be sure to use the word “game” more than once, and to offer her alternatives. Things like “i love the time i spend with you, and i want to be your slave forever. But i’d like to play a different game, as blackmail really doesn’t give me any excitement at all anymore.”. Even tell her blackmailing is boring you, and that you want to spend your time with her doing something better. Never stop acting calm, and if she insists in the nasty way, leave her with a firm “ok, whatever. I’ll go visit someone else” and go. After this, never return to Her unless she is the one getting in touch with you. In that case, keep playing this part.

3 – The Silence

Stop contacting her or answering her messages. Ignore her completely (and i mean completely). Lead her to believe you don’t care anymore, or you are totally busy doing something else. If she has other slaves, she will leave you alone and move on. But warning: this works ONLY if she is smart enough to know that she shouldn’t really do anything “seriously”. If she is stupid, or inexperienced, this could easily lead her in using the info she has of you to contact your relatives or similar to get a reaction from you.

4 – The Threat

This is the worst way to end it, because doing this you won’t be able to visit Her anymore, not even for other kind of fun. She will HATE you after this, so be careful if this is not how you want things to end with Her.
Tell her you will report all this to the site she works with. Remember, for those sites a customer is the holy grail, and blackmail is illegal. If you tell the site that she blackmailed you without your consent, she will face big problems with the site, her account could be closed, her money could be kept. If she doesn’t work on a cam site, tell her you rill report her to the site you used to send money to her with (Paypal, Payoneer or whatever). Either way, be sure to tell her this is illegal and you won’t stop till she faces serious issues. Act as you are more dangerous than her. And leave the conversation in a sudden way, with one last bad sentence like “Ok, you’ll see!” and disappear. After that, don’t contact her for a long time. She won’t contact you as well and you’ll be free.

So will i be surely free after this?

No. These are all the methods that came to my mind the first time i faced an issue like this: it happened to me a few times already, and each time i used the method of these that i thought was more appropriate for the situation and the Goddess involved. But that doesn’t mean that i can be 100% sure these methods will work in your case! it can even be that She won’t stop…so be careful. Always.

Money slavery: here’s how I found my balance

Money slavery: here’s how I found my balance

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As you probably all know, I’m a moneyslave for ages now (five? six? I lost count). At first, I tried to fight this fetish of mine. Let’s face it, this is probably one of the worst fetishes when it comes to its interference into your everyday life. You end up spending a lot of money that you could have been used in other ways (for your life, your family, whatever). So it’s obvious that i first tried to fight it, to end it, to stop it totally.

I failed. Tried again… and failed. Tried..and failed.

It’s in our nature, it’s what drives us crazy. Giving money to a gorgeous woman that uses her beauty to drive us crazy, to reduce our brain to a tiny little…ATM. Where she just pushes a button and gets whatever she wants. And we literally explode with pleasure when this happens.

Let’s face it: it’s impossible to stop being a moneyslave.

You can’t just listen Goddess Resha calling you a dog and asking you to bark without getting excited. While Goddess Kmy keeps crossing and uncrossing her legs, what can you do other than become like a zombie? And whenever MsClassy looks at you directly into your eyes, with her perfect face, telling you that she’s going to show her latest agent provocateur stockings…what else can you do other than pay, pay, pay for that? And don’t make me mention the most natural reaction to One Great Diva special attitude: she just needs to snap her fingers while looking at You as only Her can do…and you are doomed.

But again… every day we feel the same fear. What if this fetish takes over our lives, what if we can’t control it anymore, what if we really go totally broke?

After ages and ages of looking for a way out of this, I came to the conclusion that each of us, needs to find a balance between what we need in our everyday life and..money slavery.

How can we find this balance?

Well, I don’t know about you…but I can tell you how I did it and how I think everyone should do it. The very first thing to do is put your everyday life as the MAIN thing to think about. And to do so…start this by masturbating and cumming…only AFTER that you’ll be able to focus on your everyday life…you know that better than me.

You need to find out how much money you really need each and every month, how much you will need for your future plans…just come out with a rough number, or with a few options. But please, DO NOT think about any Goddess at this moment. Log off from Twitter, Facebook, internet. Just focus on yourself.

After this…the hardest part. I don’t know about you…but I’m not rich. And when I did this “game”, I came out sad. Because from that number to my wage the distance was…almost none. I came out with “ok, I have 100$ a month for money slavery”….you can easily judge from my spendings that this is WAY far from what I need to spend as a moneyslave…. the only solution I had? Find another job. And that’s what I did. I am now working not less than 12 hours per day, but I can surely state that I found my balance. I let my earnings from this new job go to a new bank account I created, and it’s from there and only there that I take money for my financial domination fetish.

Is it a hard life? Maybe…but I am satisfied. I could never imagine completely stop giving money to those gorgeous women that use my fetishes in such a perfect way…and I’m more than happy to work more for this.

What about you? Did you find your balance?

What to do when your Goddess goes on holiday

What to do when your Goddess goes on holiday

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It’s that time of the year again… summer. Holidays. Vacation. And the same question arises: What to do when Your Goddess goes on vacation and you are alone with your fantasies and sexual needs?

Go and serve someone else?

WRONG!

And it’s not wrong just because you won’t be loyal to Her (you all know i am not the most loyal slave)…but it’s wrong because it’s a waste of money.
Don’t let your sexual needs make you serve just…anyone. If you just can’t help it, at least try to spend a bit more time looking for someone else: look on twitter, look on your favorite camsite, look on my site (lol, i’m kidding)…but just don’t serve anyone just because you need to serve.

Trust me…i speak from experience. After you do it, you’ll feel like an idiot. A total, complete, unsatisfied, idiot.

So..choose carefully or…. why don’t you try to stay loyal?

Are you in this situation these days? I would be happy to hear your thoughs on this…feel free to leave a comment

Everything you think you know about addiction is WRONG

Everything you think you know about addiction is WRONG

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Today i stumbled across this TED talk from Johann Hari, a british journalist that spent three years researching the war on drugs, trying to understand if what we know about drugs and addiction is correct…or wrong.

I won’t spoil the video too much, but it’s rather interesting for all those people that thinks to know everything about addictions….and especially for all those people coming up with “you should just stop, this is stupid”. And yes, financial domination can be quite related to a few things he says.

Watch the video…it will make you think.

Obviously, financial domination can’t be compared to drugs….or…can it?

In the end what he says about the rat park can be something that a moneyslave is looking for as well. And it’s actually true: the few times that i really wanted to escape from this, i managed to stay away only focusing on the great things in my life…like my family, my job (jobs, actually), my hobbies…but the thing is….is this really an addiction? or is it just part of who i am?

Because in the end… looks like you turn into drugs to escape your everyday life…but when i turn into financial domination, i do it to satisfy a sexual need i have…so what could it be my rat park? What could fulfill my needs and make me stop my financial domination fetish?

What do you think?

Here’s why staying away from Financial Domination is worst than embracing it

Here’s why staying away from Financial Domination is worst than embracing it

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This is a lesson I’m learning through time and huge mistakes: if I stay away from financial domination, I’m always ending up spending more when I get back to it (because I always do).

The same thing happened last night when, after about a month of low expenses, I saw a Goddess was online and I couldn’t stop myself from visiting her again.

Again, She was absolutely stunning. After a while that we were just talking (well I was trying to, mesmerized by her beauty), she showed me her brand new Gucci shoes and told me “do you think they would look good with nylons?”

That was the beginning of my failure in reducing expenses. I ended up spending about 600$ and… I came like I never did in about a month.

I can’t stay away from what excites me so much, I just can’t stay away from it.

While writing this article, I went to update the page where I keep the status of this financial domination problem…and well it’s true. I was slowing down (a bit) and, till last night, I had spent just 200$ in the whole of April…

5 rules to approach a Mistress in Videochat

5 rules to approach a Mistress in Videochat

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What happened today really surprised (and honoured me): one of my goddesses posted a comment to my blog! At first i was (and well, still am) VERY excited by this…but the nature of the comment made me think a lot: she is angry.

Luckly she’s not angry with me (or well, not yet), but she is with some of the guys coming to her video after reading about Her on my blog because…well they just don’t know how to properly approach a Mistress online: so that’s why i thought about writing this sort of guide, especially because after all this time, i think to know what should be done. I believe this set of rules is valid for any cam session you might have, but in my case it has always been my favoirte cam site (this one)
1. Don’t think she can read your mind
That’s probably the main mistake many guys do. They think that because of She is a Mistress, She knows immediatly what the guy visiting her chat for the first time is into. Wrong. There are so many different kind of slaves, that you NEED to at least give her some hints of what you are looking for. Of course i know how hard it is to talk while you are in presence of a Mistress, but try to at least give her some hints!

2. If you are not into domination, just don’t visit her
Many Mistresses are of course incredibly beautiful women, so they also attract other kind of guys (not only slaves). But if she is a Mistress, don’t expect she will do anything else than dominate you! If you are looking for a Barbie Doll that will undress for you, just go somewhere else!

3. Entertain her
It can be with words, with actions, with gifts…anything. But try to be a bit active during the chat, that will most probably entertain the Mistress and the whole experience will be much better. But be careful: don’t be too active, always respect what She wants!

4. Don’t ask Her to do things for you
You are there to serve Her, not the other way around. If She wants to use your weaknesses (that you need to tell her or let her guess) then she will, if she doesn’t want to don’t ask her to. She’s there to be served and spoiled, not to entertain you. But be sure that if She is a great Mistress, She will use your weaknesses against you, she surely will.

5. Be patient
There is no Mistress out there that likes to run for us, slaves. She will take Her time, She will decide how long You will have to stay before having the chance to see anything. She is in charge during the videochat, not you. So just be patient and follow her.

WARNING!
Follow these simple rules and you will surely be in trouble as i am. But that’s what, deep inside, we are all looking for, aren’t we?

A thought about being a slave

A thought about being a slave

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There are lots of Mistresses that contact me pretending to be served, acting as they already own me. And when i don’t react as a slave with them, they immediately define me as “fake”.  Let me just say that this is totally ridiculous.

I’m a slave when a Mistress hits my “weak” points, not just because she calls herself a Mistress.

There are two special Mistresses that made me the moneyslave i am… because they hit my weak points, every time i see them, in a totally natural way. Because they are the Mistresses I’m meant to serve… unless i finally succeed in stopping this money slavery problem of mine…