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Category: FinDom sessions: The slave dos and don’ts

The 10 commandments of a moneyslave

The 10 commandments of a moneyslave

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I have been a moneyslave for nearly 12 years now, and I think my experience can be useful to those just starting up into this. Through these years I made mistakes, lots of them. But I also spent some fantastic time with beautiful Goddesses. And I believe my success also comes from following some rules that, I believe, every slave should follow. So there they are and, please, you are more than welcome to comment on these.

1 – Don’t lie to a Goddess

If you lie to a Goddess, you will be the first one to suffer from that. Your session with Her won’t be as great as it could have been and, in time, she will find out about your lies and lose trust in you

2 – Don’t hide your true nature

This is very important especially during the first sessions you have with a Goddess. She can’t read your mind, She needs to know exactly what you are into so that she can give you the session you dream of

3 – Don’t settle for less

It’s always tempting to spend less money. You see two Goddesses that are somehow of interest to you (or look like it). One is clearly cheaper than the other one, but she is also less beautiful, has less style. You still like her, but not as much as the most expensive one. Well, don’t go with the cheaper one just because you want to save some money. You will end up spending with the cheaper AND spending with the most expensive one since you will crave for Her anyway. 

4 – Let go of your regrets

It’s difficult to avoid regrets. We all have them one time or another. But focusing on them, or letting them turn us away from our true nature is simply wrong. You are doing what makes you feel happy, you spent what you could spend at that moment. Don’t regret it.

5 – Never be a freeloader

If you really consider yourself a moneyslave, you will never, never, ever pretend ANYTHING for free from your Goddess. Always remember the value of Her time, the value of Her attention. And act as you acknowledge it.

6 – Think about your loved ones

It’s easy to lose control for us, but that never has to take your mind totally away from your family. If anything, take some precautions. Make it more difficult for yourself to spend more of the budget you thought. Your loved ones might be hurt by your actions: don’t let that happen.

7 – Respect the roles of the game

You are the slave, She is in charge. All the time. Never think for a moment that it can be anything different than this. She’s not your friend, She’s not any Woman: she’s your Goddess. And you always have to treat her as such.

8 – Don’t waste your time

The internet is full of girls (or even guys pretending to be girls) that think financial domination is easy money. They think all it gets is to ask for money from a slave, call him in some dirty ways, and he will just pay them. Don’t be THAT slave. If they think like this it’s because we’ve let them think like this, and we must work together to stop this nonsense. There are some of us who simply can’t distinguish a real Goddess from a fake one: this has to stop. Look around, document yourself, or simply compare those instadommes with the real Goddesses out there. Do they act the same? Do they do the same things, in the same way? Can’t you really see the differences? I know you can.

9 – Always thank Her

At the end of every session, or after she allows you to tribute her, you must always thank her. She just gave you what you wanted, she just spent some of her precious time with you, and she allowed you to spend some truly exciting time with her: the least you can do is be polite and thank Her for this.

10 – Write your own story

Each one of us is unique, there is no need for you to pretend to imitate someone else or to even compare yourself to others. You are who you are and, providing you will follow all these commandments, your experience as a moneyslave will be as valuable as the others. Other slaves can have different tastes, different amounts of time and money to dedicate to this, different things they like: but they are not you. Be yourself, enjoy financial domination as you think it’s best for you, and don’t compare yourself to others. If anything, look for ideas, suggestions, tips from other slaves: but never think their story can be exactly like yours. And also stop thinking because you have less money than them, you can’t be a good moneyslave. Financial Domination is about submission, total financial submission. The amount is not important, it’s how much it really means to you that is important.

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The Findom Cycle

The Findom Cycle

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I have been a moneyslave for more than 10 years now, and sometimes I like to sit back and take a look at my actions from an “external” point of view: it’s interesting to find common paths that happen over and over the years, some common sequence of events that characterize me as a moneyslave. 

There is one in particular that I can see repeating itself over and over, almost daily in some periods, it’s the one I like to call: The Findom Cycle.

It’s for sure nothing that anyone into financial domination for a while doesn’t know about yet, but perhaps it will be interesting to describe its phases to those that still didn’t notice it.

1 – The Caution

Every moneyslave starts by trying to be cautious: we always believe we can hold back, we can control ourselves. So we kinda look at our Goddess (or more than one) from a distance, taking brief looks at their pictures, briefly reading their messages on Twitter, but always ending up with a reason to don’t spend. With a reason why we should just look away and get on with our life. How long this work for changes from slave to slave and, more important, from period to period. There are certain periods of my life where I can be cautious for a few days only before going to the next phase, other times I can stay longer. It all depends on many different things: from the situation in my real life, till how satisfactory (and expensive) was my last session and yes, also the kind of “signals” I get from Goddesses (for a clear example, read my article about how “Variety triggers me“.

As time goes by though, we all start to feel the urge of a session, of a tribute. That little voice in our head saying “come on, why not? Isn’t it what you really want to be happy?”. Perhaps we try to fight this little voice for a while…but soon enough the next phase happens. 

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2 – The Enjoyment

That’s it. Enough being cautious. Enough holding back. We embrace our nature, we need to do what we desire the most. Looking at our Goddess (or at Goddesses) has a different meaning now, we NEED a session, we NEED a small thing that “ticks” our desire, that makes us do that final step, that makes us embrace what we are and makes us crawl at a Goddess to beg for a session. It can be a twit, a picture, something she says, a particular moment of our life…we are basically only looking for a pretext. For a reason to send a tribute or have a session. And when that happens, we fully enjoy our fetish. We are money slaves and, at that moment, we are totally happy with our nature. The session happens, the drain happens, our happiness starts from now and lasts till the session… or even a bit more actually. 

3 – The Day After

And then there is the day after. What happens after a drain session? How do we feel when we cool down? How do we feel thinking back at what we did? Well, it depends. We don’t all react the same way, and we don’t react each time the same way. But I can bet that most of the time, we regret what we did. We regret the big-spending, the big weakness, the uncontrollable desire to send money. It’s what we love, it’s what made us happy during the session but… then there are real-life consequences. Could I have spent that money in a better way? Could have I saved them for later? Why did I have to spend them all in such a short time? 

Anyway, the last phase usually doesn’t last long. Unless we are in one of those life moments for a money slave when we say “ok fuck it, I need to stop all this forever”, the regret doesn’t last more than a day or two. After that, usually, the first phase comes back… in the never-ending Findom Cycle.

Money is meant to be spent, don’t hold back

Money is meant to be spent, don’t hold back

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Money is meant to be spent. Don't hold back in Financial Domination

Everything about Financial Domination starts (and ends) with money. This is quite an obvious fact: we get excited when we pay the Domme, when she takes money from us or when she abuses our weaknesses to bring us in giving her more and more. The dilemma is always the same: how much should we spend?

Giving her everything

In a perfect financial domination relationship, the slave gives everything to his Goddess, leaving her all the control on what he can or cannot spend. If he can eat, if he can buy some clothes. Everything. But this is very rare, not many of us can commit to such a life. 

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Giving only what’s left

The opposite way is the safest one: you define a budget you are willing to spend and stick to it. With no exceptions. That way, you can perfectly live your financial domination relationship while still living a normal life. More often than not this starts as a good idea, and soon enough we fail to apply it. The urge to spend is too high, our self control too low. Moreover, this is also not exciting: the danger to spend too much is part of what we find exciting, let’s don’t deny it.

Always spend more than you planned

FeetGoddess perfect ass in pantyhose

It may look too risky perhaps, but this is probably the best way to live Financial Domination. Try to plan your expenses but…don’t hold back. If giving to your Goddess makes you feel good, by all means, go for it. There are people who spend thousands of euros on vacations, others spend it on sports cars, on clothes, shoes…so why can’t we spend a lot on what makes us feel better? Are there some risks in this? Sure there are, the same risks people take when they buy a new car which is far from a safe budget. But they still do. Because money is meant to be spent on things that make us feel good. Never hold back, go for it and you won’t have regrets.

And you? How do you live your financial domination? 

Choosing a Goddess to serve

Choosing a Goddess to serve

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I know many will say “slaves have no power, they are just there to serve Goddesses”, and I know many Goddesses (especially the “wannabe” ones) will believe that. To them, a slave exists only to serve ANY Goddess, no matter what she looks like, say or do.

Well let me open your eyes: this is NOT true. We, slaves, do have one power, and it’s one of the most important ones for you to become our Goddess. 

We choose which Goddesses to serve

There is simply no way a Goddess can be the right one for every slave: each one of us has different tastes, different fantasies, different things that make him “going”. And because I get dozen of messages from basically ANY kind of Goddess, I thought of writing a post about the process I usually go through before I become a slave of one particular Goddess.

How she looks like

This is the very first factor that drives my attention toward a Goddess. And it’s not just about her body, it’s also about her dressing style. I have a fetish for feet in nylons (especially pantyhose) so if, say, I look into her Twitter and see she never wears stockings and pantyhose or doesn’t like them, I just move away. Nylons are important to me and more important is that She wears them because She wants and likes to, not just because I like them. One “plus” for me is also if she seems to have many different outfits that she uses. Too often some girls are always showing the same clothes, making it look like they are sort of wearing a “uniform to go to work”. I prefer a woman who loves to put different stuff on, making me think she enjoys getting ready before starting her domination session.

Her attitude

After I’m intrigued by the way She looks, I start following her on social media or camsites, if she works on one with free cam shows. This way, I can get a better understanding of the kind of Goddess She is. Is she aggressive? Is She mean? Does she seem to be enjoying what she does? Does she seem bored? Is she funny? There isn’t a “list” of things I like or don’t like here. Each Goddess is different, and I might like one for a reason, another one for the very opposite of that. So let’s say that I more or less try to understand if her attitude “makes me going” or it’s so bad that simply makes me forget I like the way she looks.

My first approach

If I’m still interested in Her, of course, the next step is approaching Her. Let me be clear here: I try to NEVER waste her time, and ALWAYS have total respect for Her and Her valuable time. So my approach is never like talking hours with Her for free or making her waste tons of time on social media. A few comments here and there on pictures I like, some engagement on Her posts, some small talk in free chat. Nothing else. Just to let Her know I exist so that when I will go for a session I won’t be someone she never heard about. Usually, nothing goes wrong here, because I don’t expect much from Her. I know they are all super busy, and I know the proper way of making myself noticed is with a tribute. But some of them are better than others, and they end up engaging a bit with me. Even a short reply to my messages can be nice, makes me feel like she’s aware of what’s happening around her, she’s not just sitting there waiting for sessions. That’s a nice thing.

The first session

Now it’s time to have my first session with Her: I’m interested in Her, I like how she looks, how she dresses, how she engages and behaves…sure I want to be at her feet!

And yet… sometimes it happens that only during the first session I understand She’s not one for me. Of course, I don’t expect her to magically understand all of me in just one session or the very first session to be perfect.. but there are a few things here and there that can be a total turn off for me. I don’t even know how to describe them, because every session is different…but if they happen, that will be my first and last session with her. It happened more than a few times, unfortunately. 

Wrapping up

So this is the “process” I follow each time I spot a Goddess I didn’t know before. It may seem odd or too complicated but…believe me, every (serious) slave does the same. We all want to have the best experience ever, and there are thousands of potential Goddesses out there. The least we can do is choose wisely….don’t you think?

Sex is overrated.

Sex is overrated.

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Did the title catch your attention? I hope so, because I will try to explain better what I mean, and I do hope to have your full attention. Not sure if many slaves will agree on me about this, but I’m kinda curious about it.

What does excite me?

That’s where this all idea started. I started questioning myself what is that gets me going, what excites me, what…well…what makes me hard the most.

And you will probably say “Come on, it’s findom. We know that”. Wrong. It’s not JUST findom, it’s findom done in a certain way, it’s something more than findom or, to be precise, something BEFORE findom.

The teasing.

A woman, self-confident, perfectly aware of the effect She has on men, perfectly aware of what makes me weak, that slowly starts doing things that get me going. 

A shoe slowly coming off the foot, then dangling from the tip of her toe. Her legs flexing back and forth, to expose all their length and beauty. The noise of nylons rubbing together. That knowing smile on her face, while she looks right into my eyes. Her tongue slowly going all over her lips. Her sexy walk on those high heels, with her body perfectly balanced on them. The tone of her voice: calm, relaxed and yet tremendously sexy. 

All these things lead me to be so excited, so hypnotized by her, so eager to see her doing more of that stuff….that I end up losing control, and at that point sending more money only excites me even more. That’s the moment when Findom comes in place.

What about sex?

Everyone says how great sex is, how they couldn’t live without it. Apparently, no one can be happy without sex, no couple can survive if sex isn’t amazing and perfect. There is no way one can be fulfilled without sex…but is that really true? Do we really all think like this? 

To me, sex is like going to the gym. Lots of physical activity, lots of sweating, you feel tired afterward and…while you are at it, do you actually enjoy it? Sorry but I don’t. I don’t need my penis inside a vagina to feel pleasure, I don’t need to do all those exercises to be satisfied. Hell, sometimes I don’t even need to cum to be totally happy!

Is this selfish? Yes, it is. I know that a woman probably needs sex more than I do to be satisfied. And I do have sex with my wife…but that doesn’t mean I find it more exciting than being teased. Is this weird? Probably, but who cares? I’ve been called a weirdo for many other things!

Am I the only one?

I’ve been asking myself quite a lot and, frankly, this is also one of the reasons why I wrote this post. The fact that I would rather be teased than have sex, doesn’t feel totally right. I have complete respect for Women (obviously, being a slave) so their pleasure should always come first, but instead I’m being way too much selfish in feeling like this. 

But then again…is this something I can control? Can you teach someone to like chocolate if he does not? 

So yes, the main question here is… am I the only one who would rather be teased till he cums, instead of actually have sex? Can you help me understand this, guys?