I am just a coward
I need to face reality. I will never have the balls to meet a financial domination Mistress in real. Never.
Why do I say this? Because yesterday, Goddess Ishtar, a gorgeous, smart, powerful Goddess I visit quite often online (although I’ve never talked about Her on this blog) told me She is going to be in Florence this weekend. Yes, in TWO DAYS she will be more or less 5 km far from where i work. And she didn’t hide the fact that She would have been ready to meet me….
But I am too scared. Too scared of losing control. Too scared of spending a real fortune. Too scared to do things I might regret in the future. Too scared to live my fantasy in real. Too scared.
She knows way too well how to make me weak, She made it very clear that She would bring me shoe shopping. She made it very clear that Her goal is to be even more in control of the situation with me.
And I am just a big coward. I will not meet Her. And I will keep imaging how it would have been….
Inside The Mind Of A PayPig
After 15+ years inside financial domination, I finally wrote a book about obsession, shame, desire and the questions I am still trying to answer.
Read the free sample