There are moments in this strange passion of ours that feel almost shared, even when you are not part of the scene. This is exactly what happened with Peter in September.
He is someone I have known for a long time, a quiet and kind man with a deep curiosity for financial domination. He reads my blog, he often writes to me, he sends questions, doubts, daydreams. And during those weeks I felt like I was right there with him, even if the meeting was his.

Everything started on the 24th of August, when he wrote to me with a mix of hope and fear:

I might have a chance to meet her, but I do not want to jinx it.

At first, he did not even dare to believe it. Years ago, Goddess Ishtar had tested him with a message saying she was in Amsterdam, then revealed she was not there. He learned, like all of us, that with Ishtar nothing is random. Nothing is casual. You follow her pace, always.

But this time it was different, this time it was real.
When he wrote that sentence, I already felt the spark inside him. And, I admit it, something inside me moved as well.

From that moment, everything accelerated.
He told me he had proposed a visit to a Louboutin store, she had asked for the catalogue, and they were already planning the entire scene.
The day after, he wrote again, panicking because the Amsterdam store had closed a few weeks earlier. I started searching for a mall that still sold the brand, found one, told him. He replied that he had already suggested it to her and she approved.

The excitement in his messages kept growing.
He ordered the pair she wanted so he could bring them to the dinner they had booked.
He kept asking me things, because I had already met her two times.
Not only that, but he was so nervous that he even missed his train stop because he was thinking about her. And I smiled, because I knew exactly what that felt like. The heart that wants to jump outside your chest, the mind that tries to stay rational but cannot.

As the day got closer, his confidence grew together with the tension. He wrote I feel like I can rule the entire creation, and yes, that is the sensation she can give you even before you see her eyes.
Goddess Ishtar is the top of the top of findom, and he knew that very well, as much as I did. He felt proud of himself. I could read it in every line he sent.

When the heels arrived, he immediately wrote to me. I told him I hoped she would let him help her put them on, and he replied saying it would be impossible for him to stay calm, not shake, not make mistakes.

He told me the meeting would happen on a Monday evening, after a day of work.
He confessed that he would not be able to focus on anything during the day, which made me laugh. None of us would.

A few hours before the meeting, he asked me about my last drain with her in Portugal. If she used my phone or hers to send the money.
I told him the truth.
She used mine, because with her feet in my hands, there was not a single part of me capable of saying no.
I sent him photos.
He was breathing fast.

I tried to calm him at least a little, because I knew that too much tension can blur the moment.
I told him that every meeting is different, that she knows exactly how to shape the scene around the person she has in front of her, and that everything would be perfect.
I also wrote something like:

Try not to let this pressure ruin the night, enjoy it.
This is for your pleasure as well as for hers.

It seemed to ease his nerves a bit, and he thanked me for staying close during those moments. For being the person he could trust with something so intense and personal. There are not many people you can open up to about this kind of experience, but if there was someone who understood exactly what he was feeling, it was me.

On the train, just before arriving at the restaurant, he was nervous about conversation topics.
I reassured him again. She knows how to lead, always. I suggested he could ask her about her first days in Amsterdam, simply to break the ice.

Then the time arrived. And I waited.
I was strangely tense too, even though I was at home, quietly.
I knew what that night meant for him.

When he wrote again after the meeting, I could feel his happiness through the screen.
He told me he hated saying goodbye.
That she is even more beautiful in person.
That the two hours passed in a second, and he will never forget them.
He even used the words I am in love several times. I smiled again, because I know what she can do without even trying.
He said she looked at him with those eyes, that she teased him gently, and yes, she allowed him to help her put the shoes on.

I was happy for him. Truly.
At the same time, I felt a small sting inside. A mix of admiration and jealousy.
Because even though I met her two times, even though she drained me hard in Portugal, she remains an impossible presence. A force that both of us crave.
Something that makes you want to kneel again after five minutes.
Something you never get used to.

Watching Peter live all this through our messages made me feel close to him, almost as if I had been sitting at a corner table, silent, seeing everything unfold from behind a thin glass.
He lived a dream that many share, and I lived it with him, from a distance, with a warm pride in my chest and that familiar ache that comes every time someone gets to serve her.

Because with Goddess Ishtar it is always like this.
Your happiness for the other person is real, sincere, pure.
Your jealousy is real as well.
And both feelings belong to her, completely.

If you are reading this and wondering how it would feel to live a moment like Peter did, remember that every journey begins with a single step. If the idea of serving her stirs something inside you, then start now. Join her on her official fansite and let her guide you toward your own moment.