submanuk
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all of you guys thoughts are valid, i can relate to them.
i was extremely loyal to one domme for many years, only occasionally chatting to anyone else. when we ‘drifted’ it wasn’t due to me (much).
i then found it very difficult to find any women i could get aong with and, as you say, the time that it takes to get to know someone. i’ve often thought i found someone special only to find that i’ve lost interest after a few days or weeks.
other times, i’ve been in ‘that state’ and been flitting around trying to chat with dommes to find someone suitable. usually they are new to it or too young to get it or not interested in taking the time to know a sub. deeply unsatisfying when you get in that mess. i suspect that this is the reason why you have ‘a few favourites’ and will go to another if your current favourite is not online. i don’t think that is disloyal but no doubt your dommes do. timing and availability is very important indeed for them to catch you in the right mood. especially if they are not able to create the mood because they don’t know you well enough.
smuk
i firmly agree with this:
probably the most seductive approach (ok, secondmost) was “Come and chat to me, I want to get to know you better.”.
i’ve read your blog with great interest for many years, i think i found it within a few weeks of you originally starting it.
primarily i’ve been with one domme for a very long time but i’ve managed to calm things down the last couple of years.
sometimes it can be very hard not to waste money on a girl you’ve just met but it is much more intense and humiliating when you’ve got to know each other over a period and you still feel the need.
i agree, when they act like they need money that is a big turnoff. however, i’ve chatted with a few who definitely needed the money but tried not to show me. i found that hot for some reason.
big turnoffs for me are when the domme is disinterested such as not asking any questions, whether that is personal questions or about the fetish.
another is when they ask for tributes or payments right at the start with absolutely zero effort to understand if we are compatible in any way.
my third is is she starts ramping up the price to ridiculously inappropriate levels. that applies if we’ve just met or if she has known me for a while.
these turnoffs actually indicate a lack of intelligence to me. an intelligent woman is looking for the longer term benefits and all of the above arise from short term aspirations.
one that is very particular to me is when a domme tells me how much i’m loving it. i know it is weird but i’m not loving it but i am aroused by it (what a dilemma!). ok, i know that is probably very specific to me.
the other thing is, this can be (is) an extremely expensive fetish. if i have any sense of worth it is because i know i’m literally valuable to a domme and that makes me very choosy about the women i submit to. this makes it difficult to find the right one in the first place.
we’re all very different even within this ‘genre’.
pleased to meet you at long last
smuk
