It’s getting worst. Since she raped me a few days ago, i updated my current status page and…it didn’t look good at all. I’m spending way more than last two years….and it doesn’t look like i can stop. I keep going there, looking for those Financial Domme i know but also always to seek for new ones…as if i’m always looking for more women to rape my wallet… this is not going to stop…
This had been my worst year so far. I’ve been updating my status page and i just noticed it. My Financial Domination fetish isn’t over at all…it’s actually getting stronger and more expensive. What to do? I don’t really have an answer to this question…all i know is that at the moment my mind is only focused on One Great Diva’s feet, on her legs, on her eyes… nothing else counts at the moment…nothing else.
It doesn’t help to feel like being a slave of more than one Mistress, as i am… there are times…when… i’m the mood to serve…i’m ready to let them use their power on me but… no one of them is online. Tonight is one of those nights…and all i can do is…dream about them.
It doesn’t stop…that’s a fact. I am spending more than last year and surely i am not slowing down… perhaps…this is just what i want…and i should really stop fighting this… what’s the point in fighting who i am? Actually… recently i find myself thinking more and more about… real life sessions… about a Mistress (well, i can say Her name… Miss Olivia) tempting me in a public place, using my fetishes to make me weak…and then.. using me to…
Yes tonight i came back online and ended up visiting a Mistress on videochat. Now i’m confused. I don’t even know what i’m writing about… all i know is that in the last 40 minutes i went from being happy, to sad, to angry to..confused as i am. Spent a lot? no. Felt Her power? Yes. But anyway…is it so difficult to understand that i’m not exclusive? I’m a slave that lives on emotions, because they are the reason i…
What happened today really surprised (and honoured me): one of my goddesses posted a comment to my blog! At first i was (and well, still am) VERY excited by this…but the nature of the comment made me think a lot: she is angry. Luckly she’s not angry with me (or well, not yet), but she is with some of the guys coming to her video after reading about Her on my blog because…well they just don’t know how to properly approach…
Thank you, really thank you Facebook for disabling my account… had to create a new one… this one. Lost all contacts…
Ok, it’s not going well at all. I’ve started this blog hoping that i would have been able to win this fight, hoping that i would have been able to resist the temptation… Well it seems i can’t. I’ve already spent 8 thousand dollars so far this year, and it doesn’t look that i’m going to stop. The thing is… these women know how to make me weak. They know it well and they do it also because…they probably know…
August has been a hard month for me. I’ve been trying to stay away from Her, thinking in this way to actually..well…save money. But that didn’t actually happen. I kept going to other mistresses on the sites i well know (the three listed here on the right) and well.. i ended up spending quite a lot (for my standards) and… not being satisfied at all. She has something… something that really gets me. I don’t know if it’s the way she…
Sheena raped my wallet once again a few nights ago. I watched her in cam for a while, spending quite a lot and i almost sent her a tribute… i was just about to do it…when i managed to switch the computer off and, literally, run away. I really think i need to stop now, can’t go on like this. I have a family to think about and i’m really spending too much money. So last night, when i saw…