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Thinking about… real life

Thinking about… real life

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tacchi01It doesn’t stop…that’s a fact. I am spending more than last year and surely i am not slowing down… perhaps…this is just what i want…and i should really stop fighting this… what’s the point in fighting who i am?

Actually… recently i find myself thinking more and more about… real life sessions… about a Mistress (well, i can say Her name… Miss Olivia) tempting me in a public place, using my fetishes to make me weak…and then.. using me to go shopping… maybe shop about shoes… and modeling them in front of me… yes.. i am thinking about this more and more… and i find it really exciting.

But i do know one thing: that’s something i can’t afford. A real life session is going to cost WAY more than a videochat…and i can’t, can’t, can’t really afford that…at the moment…

Financial Problems… one week off

Financial Problems… one week off

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There we are… i knew this moment would have come sooner or later… i had a rough week, had been drained (literally) by OneGreatDiva and now… if i don’t take at least a week off from all this, i will have huge problems with my bank.

So it’s time to switch off my messenger, stop visiting certain sites, stop updating this blog, stop visiting my (new) facebook account.

I hope i’ll make it…if not…this could lead to serious problems…really serious.

An hypnotic voice

An hypnotic voice

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Last night i’ve experienced for the first time how a voice can really be hypnotic. Went to see Miss Olivia…and this time she probably decided to show me how she is ALWAYS in charge and in control of the situation, how she could turn myself upside down in a matter of seconds.

She started talking to me with a tonce of voice she never used before…and i swear i really felt like i was hypnotised… listening to her voice while looking at her dangling a shoe from her perfect legs in suntan pantyhose was….something i never experienced before…

If needed, i have another proof of how much she is the one that can decide what i do or what i don’t do in her presence…

Scared? No… i’m… amazed.

She’s different

She’s different

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Ok i admit. Till now i didn’t have one Mistress only, but more like a few favourite Mistresses (the three here on the right). But if i was in the “mood” and noone of them was around, i used to simply browse and look for some other potential Mistress, just to fill my need to be a bit dominated.

Tonight i am in the mood. But none of them is online and, most important, Miss Olivia is not online.

Yes i admit, i can’t even imagine going to someone else. I know it wouldn’t be the same, i know i wouldn’t enjoy it as much, i know another Mistress could never be compared to her.

So i’m here, thinking about her…and she’s not online.

This is a sad night.

New Year, new questions

New Year, new questions

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It probably all started when i met Miss Olivia. Among other things, she really can enter your brain and well… explore it ar her will. And that’s what she did and she keeps doing. But doing so…she’s making me think a lot, really a lot.

Am i really a moneyslave? Or am i just attracted by something else? And if that’s the case…what’s this “something else”? Seduction power? Beauty? Or just a pair of feet in stockings or pantyhose?

How far would i go in a real life session, in presence of a Goddess? Would i be excited, scared or…pissed off? Would i be able to fully let myself go or…my real life situation and position would make me ignore my weaknesses?

And most of all… where is this blog going? Why did i really start it? Is it still useful to my cause? Or is my cause actually changing? And if so… how is it changing?

Shit…i’m really a mess tonight…let’s update the current status… that makes sense…i guess.