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Month: February 2011

Thinking about… real life

Thinking about… real life

tacchi01It doesn’t stop…that’s a fact. I am spending more than last year and surely i am not slowing down… perhaps…this is just what i want…and i should really stop fighting this… what’s the point in fighting who i am?

Actually… recently i find myself thinking more and more about… real life sessions… about a Mistress (well, i can say Her name… Miss Olivia) tempting me in a public place, using my fetishes to make me weak…and then.. using me to go shopping… maybe shop about shoes… and modeling them in front of me… yes.. i am thinking about this more and more… and i find it really exciting.

But i do know one thing: that’s something i can’t afford. A real life session is going to cost WAY more than a videochat…and i can’t, can’t, can’t really afford that…at the moment…

Back and confused

Back and confused

Yes tonight i came back online and ended up visiting a Mistress on videochat. Now i’m confused. I don’t even know what i’m writing about… all i know is that in the last 40 minutes i went from being happy, to sad, to angry to..confused as i am.

Spent a lot? no. Felt Her power? Yes.

But anyway…is it so difficult to understand that i’m not exclusive? I’m a slave that lives on emotions, because they are the reason i spend… and emotions can come from different Mistresses… is it that difficult to understand? Why someone would be mad about it? And why this should cause me problems?

I don’t know. I am just confused…only thing i know for sure is that danger excites me, especially if it’s a beautiful and intelligent danger.

That’s all for tonight… probably no one will understand what i wrote…but in the end…a blog is personal….and even this one is personal. I write about what i feel, about whom i feel… and no one should even dream of telling me what to write or should try to influence my life because of what i write here.

Financial Problems… one week off

Financial Problems… one week off

There we are… i knew this moment would have come sooner or later… i had a rough week, had been drained (literally) by OneGreatDiva and now… if i don’t take at least a week off from all this, i will have huge problems with my bank.

So it’s time to switch off my messenger, stop visiting certain sites, stop updating this blog, stop visiting my (new) facebook account.

I hope i’ll make it…if not…this could lead to serious problems…really serious.