If you want to be a Goddess, DON’T look cheap

If you want to be a Goddess, DON’T look cheap

First of all, let me say that I’m not quite sure if I already wrote about this matter in the past, but I’m simply too angry to go and check. I just NEED to cool it off by writing it down.

If you want to be considered a Goddess online, don’t look f***ing cheap. Don’t ACT cheap. Don’t DRESS cheap. Don’t TALK cheap. Don’t THINK cheap.

Let’s stop looking at this from the slave/Goddess perspective point of view, and for a moment let’s talk about what you all are really doing here.
What you are doing online is a form of entertainment (one of the best ones, in my opinion), you are making me live a dream, a fantasy. You are actually SELLING me a fantasy. And this particular kind of fantasy involves well… money. More than any other kind of fantasies.

Your role is the one of a Goddess. You are the one every man desire. You are the one who looks down at men and just doesn’t care about them, because you don’t need them or their money. You already have all you want, but you are kind enough to allow slaves to come and worship, serve, and spoil you. That’s your role ok? Focus on this.

Now, for the love of God, why on Earth you would think that details are not important? This is ALL about details! Everything around you matters, everything I see when I look at you matters. Everything you do matters. Everything you say matters. It all counts to build this fantasy.

I’m not here saying everything should be perfect, I’m not that picky of course. But damn…there are a few things that REALLY drive me MAD. An example? Well, let me describe to you what just recently happened that made me write this post.

A few weeks ago I spotted a beautiful Goddess online. Her pictures are great, she seems to be very aware of what I like to call “The power of nylons”, and Her whole image seems perfect. Even what she writes on her profile is great. So, after a while, I decide to go and see Her.

The first night was nice, she was sexy and powerful, only downside was that she had a quite big run on her stockings. No big deal I think, it can happen. Most probably she didn’t notice it until I was in. She could have changed them but…ok, it was just the one time.

On the second night, the run on her stockings is even bigger. Once again, I decided to give her another chance. I really like her, she seems smart, the time we spend together is great…so why not.

The third night, when I look at her, all I can see is the HUGE run on her stockings. She is STILL using the same pair, she didn’t even bother to change them. She didn’t even think it could have mattered.

The fourth night… no, I’m kidding. There is never going to be a fourth night.

Am I exaggerating you say? Really? Shouldn’t I pretend for someone who plays the part of a Goddess to pay attention to, at least, these details?

Have a look at ANY of the Goddesses I’ve been serving in more than 10 years, have a look at them. Click here and visit them, have a session with them. You will NEVER notice something similar, for sure not for two sessions in a row. It can happen to anyone of course, even to them. But what they do is either change immediately or, at least, change after the one session where the issue shows up. It’s called attention to details. It’s called dedication to your work. It’s called respect with the one who’s paying you. It’s called professionalism. And girl, if you don’t have it well… You won’t simply have me as a slave in this roleplay we do. My money is better spent elsewhere.

Sorry for the rant guys…but I just needed to write all this.

FeetGoddesss proved me wrong. Once again.

FeetGoddesss proved me wrong. Once again.

It’s not the first time (and I’m sure it won’t be the last one) that FeetGoddesss shows me how wrong I am about what I think excites me and what it doesn’t. Why? Because she’s just too powerful, that’s why.

It has only been a few days since I wrote about my (bad) opinion about group draining sessions: I don’t like them, they don’t excite me, I would never want to be in one. 

Or so I thought

I have a fetish for legs and feet in pantyhose ever since I was a teenager, and a Woman wearing trousers just doesn’t interest me. She’s not as sexy as in a miniskirt, her legs in nylon are hidden, come on it’s just not for me.

Or so I thought

If there is one way FeetGoddesss has to show me Her immense power, is proving me wrong on this kind of thing. A few nights ago, after finishing my work, I logged online just to have a look around. Started browsing Twitter, cam sites… you know, the usual stuff we all do. 

At some point, I went into FeetGoddess room.

She had a leather catsuit on, Louboutin high heels, and nylons (later I discovered being pantyhose). She looked incredible. Her perfect body was like a perfect match with that outfit, her legs looked even longer than usual, her incredible ass was breathtaking. I couldn’t leave. I had to stay and watch a bit. 

Thing is, she was super busy as usual. I could hear her asking tributes to a few different guys, giving them orders, calling them one by one: it was a group draining session. You know, that kind of session I don’t like. I thought of just enjoying the show, without taking part in it…but she was of a different opinion. 

At one point, between one order to a guy and another, she said, looking deeply into the cam:

“Spoil me Massi, it’s your turn now. You know you want to”

To be honest, I didn’t KNOW I wanted to… till then. Those words instantly turned me into an obedient puppy. I sent the first tribute and started acting like I had no brain. Well, it wasn’t really acting… she did actually take my brain away, piece by piece. She was moving in the sensual way only Her can do, her voice was hypnotic, slowly giving orders to others, then to me, then to them…one by one…sometimes I stared while she was clearly giving orders to others and ignoring me but…she did it in such a perfect way that I never felt left out. It was a constant switching between one and another, with perfect timing, always giving everyone the right attention. It was perfect. I had a magnificent time.

The next morning I woke up happy but also a bit confused. Do I even know what I like? Does it even matter? 

Group draining sessions: Not for me

Group draining sessions: Not for me

One of the reasons why it’s probably so difficult to understand the Financial Domination fetish for someone who isn’t into it (well, this is valid for any fetish I’m afraid), it’s because there is not just one single way to enjoy it. And not every slave likes it in the same way.

I’ve been a moneyslave for over 10 years and, especially since I’ve opened this blog, I’ve been in touch with many slaves: sometimes it’s nice to exchange experiences, opinions, or even comfort each other during those many crises every moneyslave goes through from time to time.

One of the things that I get asked a lot (A LOT) is to join a group draining session. Unless you live on another planet or started yesterday in Financial Domination, you sure know what that is.

A few slaves have a session with the same Goddess, all at the same time. They spoil her, they let her use them, humiliate them…one in front of the other one. Very rarely slaves can see each other, but they sure can see how every one of them reacts to the Goddess’s presence and orders. 

Well, I’m sorry but this is not for me. Not at all. I like to live my financial domination in a more direct relationship with the Goddess: I want to be the only one she’s giving orders at that moment, I want to be the only target of her power. With this, I’m not saying the Goddess needs to give me any sort of special attention, in the end, she is the one in charge…but…let’s say I don’t like to “share” her with others when I serve her. 

Is this selfish? Is this a limit I have? Am I missing some big part of the Financial Domination world? Perhaps guys, perhaps. But, as I said before, not every slave is the same…

Fixing my life, thanks to you

Fixing my life, thanks to you

The end of August was kind of a nightmare for me, and you all probably know that by now. When I wrote about my sadness and guilt, I was really down. My wife was hurt, and it was all my fault. I didn’t know what to do, it was really a horrible moment.

But that article was of huge help, especially because of all the wise and nice words I got from many of you. Some wrote to me on Twitter, some added comments here… and it was really what I needed. I will never thank you all guys enough for helping me! Reading other people’s opinions on the situation helped me put things in perspective, sit down, pull myself together, and Do something about it.

If there is something I’m good at, it’s adjusting my behavior when things are going in the wrong direction. I did the same when I found my balance on spendings, and I did the same this time. Or, better said, I’m doing it. My wife comes first, always. Her needs have to be my main concern and, although I will never stop financial domination, I need to adjust the way I am for her to be happier.

I won’t get into many details (but my guess is that you can understand what I am “fixing”), but let’s say that the last three weeks had been great between us, and I couldn’t be happier.

Does it mean I started having financial domination sessions again? Yes, but that’s another story…

Feeling guilty and sad

Feeling guilty and sad

It happened. I always thought my findom addiction was under control and was not interfering with my private life…but I was wrong. And not because of my spendings, those are actually totally under control (remember how I found my balance?), but because of my…wanking habit. Or at least that’s what I think this is, perhaps it’s deeper I don’t know.

I Love Her

First of all, I love my wife with all my heart. She is always my first thought about anything that I do, and I would never do anything to harm her. In all these years I made sure I protected my marriage from all the dangers of Financial Domination. That’s why I managed to find a balance on my spendings, and that’s why I never risked getting caught. If there is a slight risk, I just don’t even go online. She is my main priority.

My failure

But there is one thing that seems to be affecting us: my lack of sexual drive. Recently, we just don’t have sex enough. It’s about once a month, sometimes even less…and it’s not because she’s not beautiful, because she is. It’s probably because she doesn’t represent what my sexual fantasies are always about, she doesn’t even come close to what I need to get excited…and that’s starting to be an issue.

Two nights ago we spent an hour talking about this (well, talking…arguing I should say). She ended up crying, thinking this is all her fault. That I don’t like her anymore and stuff like that. We ended up cuddling and having sex …but since then I feel guilty. Extremely guilty. The one thing I never wanted to happen, it’s happening. I’m hurting her. And it’s all because I probably spend too much time fantasizing on Financial Domination goddesses and stuff like that.

Is there a solution?

How can I solve this? I don’t know. The only solution I see seems impossible: many times I tried, and always failed to quit money slavery. This is who I am, this is an important part of myself, and I can’t be happy without it.
All I’m doing these days is giving more and more attention to her needs, always been there for her (even more than before), and of course, having sex more often but… how long this will last? How long till I will stop feeling guilty, and just get back as I was before?

I have no answers at the moment. I’m just sad.