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Low on cash: the forced abstinence

Low on cash: the forced abstinence

Now…this is one of the things i hate most: being low on cash (not only because of my findom addiction, but also because of other expenses) and therefore…being forced to stay away from all this world.

Yes i know, in a way i should be happy…for a week i won’t be able to spend on Financial Domination. Not a cent, nothing. I have 80$ left on my credit card…and believe me, i do need them till next pay period….

It’s exactly a forced abstinence.

What can i do about it? Nothing at all… i just need to stay away from my computer when i have privacy…when the temptation is higher… mostly because, no matter the temptation, money aren’t there…so there is no way i could see any of the gorgeous Goddess i serve.

Here’s why my financial domination fetish isn’t slowing down

Here’s why my financial domination fetish isn’t slowing down

Just a few minutes ago (while “working” here in office) i decided to update the page with all the money i spend on financial domination and what i saw scared me, even if it didn’t actually surprise me much. If i go on like this, in the whole 2013 i will spend about24.000$ ! That’s a huge amount of money, more than i’ve ever spent before.

And why is that? Why? Well there is a name behind that reason: Miss Mira

She hit me like a storm, i would have never thought to find another Goddess as addictive as Sheena, as powerful as MsClassy, as smart as One Great Diva. But yet…i did. And there She is.

Each time i see her online, i can’t stop myself by letting her know i am online…i don’t contact her, trying to pretend i don’t want to go serve her. I also put up sort of silly “deadlines” to myself…things like “ok if She doesn’t order me to go in by the next 20 minutes, i’m going offline”. Silly, stupid games that never work. Because deep inside, all i want to do is see how She’s dressed, admire Her beauty, let Her play with my brain, let Her be as evil as She wants with me… like the other day when She convinced me to give Her my personal phonenumber, to torture me with messages even while i am at work…just to be sure my addiction doesn’t go any lower.

The only limit here, is my credit card. It has some limits (as every card) and i got close to them lots of times this month, as they are weekly limits…but when those limits reset and are far… all i want to do is go and see Her, go and let Her do anything She wants to my brain…

Last time i went to Her it was two nights ago. She was dressed incredibly as ever, with stockings and a short dress. I immediatly got more or less hypnotized, and only a “family” problem saved me from spending another fortune…but before logging off, She ordered me to spend money on another Goddess, as gorgeous as Her, as strong as Her. And so i did. I visited Kristal, a gorgeous Goddess that raped my wallet the night after that… and perhaps started to be part of my nightmares.

This isn’t going to stop…this is going to get stronger and stronger.

Financial Domination is here to stay

Financial Domination is here to stay

This had been my worst year so far. I’ve been updating my status page and i just noticed it. My Financial Domination fetish isn’t over at all…it’s actually getting stronger and more expensive.

What to do?

I don’t really have an answer to this question…all i know is that at the moment my mind is only focused on One Great Diva’s feet, on her legs, on her eyes… nothing else counts at the moment…nothing else.

Let’s face it: i’m addicted to slavery

Let’s face it: i’m addicted to slavery

Why should i keep denying this?

My problem it’s not having gorgeous and powerful women (like Diva)  using my fetishes to control and ruin me… my problem is that i’m addicted to slavery.

Whenever i’m online and i don’t see any of the two Queens that are ruining me….i just go and look for other Queens (in the places i’ve actually listed here on the right), in the hope to find someone else as powerful and gorgeous as they are.

Usually i don’t find anyone as great as them (actually i never did, otherwise you would hear about it in this blog), but still…i keep spending money looking for…someone else who can rape my wallet as well as they do.

I’m addicted to slavery, let’s face it.